The Art of Becoming a Boy

Dirt
Mud
Bugs
Trains
Peeing in the Forest

All things that I am beginning to appreciate more and more.

Since literally taking almost all of my kids toys away, (you think I joke...) I have realized how much creativity my kids have in them. From making guns out of plastic coat hangers, to bob sledding down the hall in the laundry basket, I want my boys to live a life a where they aren't stifled by "stuff"

It's finding the right amount of "reasonable mess" (breathe Wendy...) and controlled chaos. I like this best when it is outside the walls of my manicured and well kept home.

So we called up our most darling friends, The Glenns, (whose boys are one week older than Blake, and three days younger than Parker!!) and headed to Haworth Park down the street from out house. We were well equipped with boots, dirty jeans, hats, and snacks. I however forgot to apply my water proof mascara upon departure from our house.

It poured...and poured, and then poured a whole lot more.

We splashed, slipped, peed in the woods (them, not me...and unfortunately not Parker...), screamed, laughed, cried, stuffed rocks in our pockets, caught bugs, watched trains, and got really really dirty.

It might have been one of the most amazing afternoons of my life.

Jesus in my heart

"Mommy, check this out! There's my heart, and there's Jesus right inside it! Oh, and my name next to it in case you forget."

Does Jesus have a handle bar stash?

Smile!!!

This is how Parker and I occupied ourselves for 75 minutes while we watched his brother get soaking wet at T-Ball practice last week.

My kids ask me all the time to take them out to lunch. I don't see the point when we have perfectly good and healthy food at our house.

Today when I told them no, they asked me to call my mom, she would take them to lunch.

"Dat Nana Gurl...she weally wikes wunch."

munch munch munch

Brusha Brusha Brusha

We went to the dentist this morning for Kids Day.

The theme of the day was baseball, and both of my children dressed themselves.

Blake was standing tall, ready in his t-ball outfit, and Parker in his Husky gear.

Who knew that we would run into the sparkly-wand-making, silly-face-painting Tooth Fairy before our appointment.

Naturally, Blake is an astronaut, while Parker is a pirate. (but not to be confused with a dalmatian.)

I have been told that neither will be taking a bath for at least 3 days.

Eeew.

Blake was into object painting one morning. After a painting of the pineapple, frog tank (not ours...don't worry...) his bowl of oatmeal, here is what he created. I am beside myself with it!

Sassy Pants and Bossy Boots

I am constantly encouraging "the littles" to go change their clothes. We have a just acquired a lovely sized 3T set of "Sassy Pants" in our home.

Where shall we begin...

Oh, how about when Parker and Blake were continuing to scream and yell to make each other laugh.

I said, "Parker, stop. Girls don't like loud noises."

His response, "Well boys do."

Or what about in the car the other day when his word of choice continued to be "Stinky"

I said, "Parker, enough! Just knock it off."

He says, "No Mommy...you knock it off."

Which then lead to silence in the car. After about 5 minutes he quietly says, "Mommy, you pritty gurl."

I sighed and said, "Thank you Parker."

He immediately says, "You happy now Mommy?"

There is a casino on the way to our house from the freeway. Blake wanted to know what it was.

I explained to him that it is a place where people take money and play games, and then hope that they win more money. However, it is also a place that people can leave with no money, which in the end can be very devastating for their lives.

Oh.

Last night we went to Chucky Cheese for the first time. My kids were beside themselves, and so were Dave and I. We were the only family there, besides our super fun friends, The Johnsons. I made it through...although it was a little touch and go from time to time.

My kids placed tokens in almost every one of the games, just to see the tickets spit out. This might have kept Parker busy for at least 45 minutes...and might I say out of the ball pit?

On our way home, as we passed the casino, Blake says, "Mommy is going to chucky cheese kind of like going to the casino? Do you think that we were wasting God's money?"

If Jesus saw the salad bar, I know he would say yes.

Mr. Pleaser

We were packing up in the car yesterday and Parker was being exceptionally snotty. I finally turned around and say, "Parker, knock it off!"

His eyebrows furrow, he purses his lips and says, "No YOU knock it off."

Not funny.

Ever.

I then proceeded to not so gently remind him that there are some things that only parents can do. Like eat ice cream for dinner...in bed! (I didn't say that.)

It was quiet in the car and he finally says, "Mommy. You pritty gwill."

"Thank you Parker."

As if on cue, he quickly responds, "You happy now?"

No.

Get it Right Mom

I was putting books away in Parker's room today and noticed a couple of random blue crayon markings on the wall.

"Parker, what is that?"

He looks at me, looks at the ground and then starts to smile.

"Whoa...did you do that? Crayons go on paper, not the wall. Did you do that today?"

He looks up, and turns very serious on me. "No mommy. I do it morrow."

"What? You did it yesterday?" I asked him.

"NO! I do it morrow. You not see it today."

On the way to school this morning, Blake and Parker were naturally arguing over the same red piece of paper, with lizards punched out of it.

It belonged to Blake, Parker had it, Blake wanted it.

Parker said, "No."

"You are bratty Parker."

I couldn't help but gasp. I turned to Blake and said, "Wow. That was mean. I am sure you know what to do next, and why don't you add in there something nice about your brother while your at it."

"Sorry Parker. You're not bratty all the time."

I am currently listening to my children talk to each other.

I asked them to pick up their rooms before dinner.

"Parker, go clean up your room."

"No."

"Parker, really. Go clean up your room."

"Hmmmm...no."

"Parker just do it. Go into your room and start cleaning it!"

No repsonse.

"I feel like all I ever say to you is clean your room Parker!"


Wait.


What?

Showing and Telling

Everyday after preschool we have the same discussion in the car.

"How was school...good"
"What was for snack...cheese and crackers."
"What did you learn...nothing."
"How was ________ (we will leave this name blank)...a little wild."

Today Blake brought Parker for show and tell.

They wore matching t-shirts. They had matching jeans. They have matching hair.

Blake went and gathered his little brother from the 2-3's class and brought him into the 4-5's circle. They shared a carpet square. They whispered and quietly giggled like a couple of girls.

Then Parker turns to Blake in a very quiet voice and says, "Who is ________?"

Blake points to the "young wild one who shall remain nameless."

Parker gets up on his knees, shakes his finger and loudly whispers to the little boy, "____________...No! No! No!"

Oh Boy...

Blake is playing t-ball.

Last week at practice they called him in from the outfield to play catcher.

He was busy collecting dandelions.

He was wearing a shirt that says, "I Heart Mom"

Stay tuned for the post where the pitcher beats him up after the game.

Sometimes being the only girl in my house makes it 3000 times more exciting when you buy new shoes.

Obviously.

Amen...

Dear Jesus, please don't let anyone from our preschool read this:

The other night I asked Parker if there was anything specific that he wanted to pray about before I tucked him in.

He said, "Mommy, pway sor Wucas" (Lucas)

"Oh really, why does Lucas need prawer?" (I can't help it!!)

"He wild boy Mommmy."

"Okay, anyone else?"

"Oh, Mommy, Madison. Naughty gurwl."

"Okay, Lucas and Madison."

"Jonah too Mommy. He kicker. Hitter boy."

"Got it. Madison, Lucas and Jonah. What about you Parker, should we pray for you?"

"Nah, me good boy."

Oh Blake...

"Mommy. When are you going to put me on the stage?

I just want to sing..."

Last night Blake was dying to help me make dinner. I had previously made dinner earlier in the afternoon, and now we just needed to place things on the stove to get it rolling again.

He helped me dump pasta in a bowl, add spaghetti sauce (with mashed up beans...little extra protein snuck in there!) and then wanted to be the cheese adder man.

Once the table was set, and everyone had their plate, he rushed back to "his" seat. On the way, his foot got stuck in my very long, very thick velvet curtain hanging on the back slider.

He flew into the table, hit his chair, which fell over and made a huge dent in the wall. Trying to catch himself, he grabbed his placemat and flipped his entire dinner onto the wall, and all over the floor.

Remember...spaghetti sauce...

He burst into tears, turned a slight shade a blue and I think at one point stopped breathing. I took him into the other room, calmed him down and had him show me where it hurt. He pulled up his shirt and showed me his chest.

His eyes got really big and he said, "I hurt right here next to my heart!"

I said, "You are right, but you are okay Blake."

"But Mommy! I am alright, but I don't know if Jesus is!"

All in a weeks work...

I think that we are having a rough week...

I have cleaned up toilet paper strewn all over my bathroom.
I have iced an eyeball from a "tipped over canoe" accident (or a stood on drawer from a train table)
I have handed the pieces of a broken closet to my 5 year old to gift to his father upon his return from work.
I have spanked a 3 year old thigh (it's true...) for laughing in my face when he was being disciplined.

Yesterday, my children had too much energy for me to be able to enjoy a MOD pizza dinner in Bellevue. I scarfed down my #2, and piled "the littles" into the car. One decides to play peek a boo with me on the far side of the car. I wanted to scream.

So I did.

As we were driving out of the parking lot, I told my boys how frustrated I was that I had to leave dinner with our entire family, because they couldn't seem to figure out an appropriate way to act in public.

The ride from Bellevue to Everett was very quiet.

As we exited the freeway, Parker asked me a question. I answered him and then I hear this from my sassy mouthed mister...

"Soooooo...does this mean you are done with all your madness?"